life in the mushroom kingdom
by onedirection3456
Summary: In the mushroom kingdom no one is normal. from the war of Mario and Luigi aka the war of the fat Italians, Mario going shopping and giving a toad drugs to get cake mix and Mario getting drunk and puking into a flower pot. this is just their normal psychotic lives.
1. Chapter 1

**this is my first fanfic. just got the idea so i said i would write it down enjoy!**

**DISCLAIMER: i don't anyone from the Mario series**

Mario we are going to be late for work Luigi called from the kitchen. Mario woke up and looked at the clock 7:30 they had to be at work by 8. Mario and Luigi were plumbers. i have breakfast ready said Luigi. oh shit not again thought Mario as he smelt smoke coming the kitchen Luigi is crap at cooking it was only last week he burnt the kitchen down Mario went into the kitchen the oven was on fire. Luigi you retard Mario face palmed and outed the fire

(two weeks later)

peach and Mario were at the castle and Luigi was on a date with waluigi (yeah that's right Luigi is gay) Mario was playing new super Mario brothers two on his 3ds. peach just drank a cup of tea. all of a sudden there was a loud crash. bowser came to kidnap peach (again) bowser grabbed peach and went to make his escape. MARIO SAVE ME screamed peach in bowers clutches. two minutes leave me finish this level said mario. MARIO I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU DON'T HELP ME I WILL GET MY UMBRELLA AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS! Mario still wouldn't help so bowser took her back too his castle. a few days later peach escaped with no help from Mario. when she got back peach kept her word mario ended up in casualty with a pink umbrella shoved up his ass

**the next chapter will be up soon read and review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Sorry the last chapter was a bit short i will make this one longer**

**DISCLAIMER: i don't own the Mario gang**

**The weather in the mushroom kingdom was crap. it was raining and there was thunder and lightning. koopa hobos sat under a tree wishing they hadn't done a rain dance earlier that week. Mario and Luigi were at work fixing pipes. there is something stuck in that pipe said Luigi. Mario you check that pipe while i get a hammer. Mario went to check the pipe and all of a sudden a piranha plant came out and dragged Mario into the pipe. Mario was screaming his head off. Luigi just watched and laughed. LUIGI YOU FUCKING BASTARD IF YOU DON'T HELP ME I WILL DISOWN YOU! Luigi gave in and helped Mario. when Mario escaped he threw a fire ball at the piranha plant and killed it. there was an awful smell and a brown stain on Mario overalls. my heart said Luigi after he caught his breath. FUCK YOUR HEART shouted Mario running to the bathroom I JUST SHIT IN MY TROUSERS Luigi sat on the ground asshole.**

**not really longer than the last chapter read and review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**chapter 3**

**DISCLAIMER: I dont own any characters**

**peach called mario and asked him to go shopping for her. he said no but she threatend to stick her umbrella up his ass again so he went. on the way he knocked over a hobo and crashed his lookes at the shopping list.**

**peaches shopping list**

**cake mix**

**princess dress**

**sparkly shoes**

**fresh peaches **

**Mario walked into the super market. A young toad took the last packet of cake mix. the toad went to pay for the cake mix when mario stopped the toad. mario had drugs in his pocket. mario gave the drugs to the toad and told him they were sweets. the toad took them and a few seconds later he started screaming O MY GOD MAN THANK YOU I SEE LOTS OF COULERS I FEEL SO HAPPY he runs over to a hobo OMG I LOVE HOBOS IM ****GGGGAAAAAYYYY! ****then he passes out. mario takes the cake mix and goes to the cash register 2 coins please. mario gave him 2 coins.**

**mario walks into a second hand shop and pickes up a torn dress with vomit staines on it and high heels with the heels snapped off them and payed 100000000000000 coins for them. **

**mario walked into the fruit and veg store and bought 300 rotten peaches (peach only wanted 5 and she wanted fresh ones) **

**mario went back to the castle and peach threw him out so he had move in with his parents for 3 weeks**

**thats the end of chapter 3 read and reveiw**


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